by Dennis M. Myers, 05/13/2020
Why do they call it the novel coronavirus? It’s a long story…
Why don’t chefs find coronavirus jokes funny? They’re in bad taste.
I’ll tell you a coronavirus joke now, but you’ll have to wait two weeks to see if you got it.
Nail salons, hair salons, waxing center and tanning places are closed. It’s about to get ugly out there.
Finland just closed its borders. You know what that means. No one will be crossing the finish line.
What do you tell yourself when you wake up late for work and realize you have a fever? Self, I so late.
Did you hear the joke about the germ? Never mind, I don’t want to spread it around.
Where do sick boats go to get healthy? The dock!
What did the sick parent make their kids for lunch? Mac and sneeze.
I ran out of toilet paper and had to start using old newspapers. Times are rough.
You know what they’re saying about 2020. It went viral faster than anyone thought it would.
What do you call panic-buying of sausage and cheese in Germany? The wurst kase scenario.
If there’s a baby boom nine months from now, what will happen in 2033? There will be a whole bunch of quaranteens.
You know what they say: feed a cold, starve a fever, drink a corona.
What should you do if you don’t understand a coronavirus joke? Be patient.
If Coronavirus isn’t about beer, why do I keep seeing cases of it?
The grocery stores in France look like tornadoes hit them. All that’s left is de brie.
So many coronavirus jokes out there, it’s a pundemic.
Yeah, I have plans tonight. I’ll probably hit the living room around 8 or 9.
What did the man say to the bartender? I’ll have a corona, hold the virus.
What types of jokes are allowed during quarantine? Inside jokes!
What’s the best way to avoid touching your face? A glass of wine in each hand.
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